stay in line
there have been so much that has been happening in my life in the past 2 weeks that i do not know where to start.
i have gone from rock bottom..
to sky high..
to rock bottom..
to sky high.
one thing in my mind now is: how do i stand firm and stay in line with God's will? today i read "if you stand for nothing, you fall for anything" and i think that is soooooooo true! it's getting so real for me these days. that i really need to know what i believe, what my convictions are and what are my values or i'll be totally swayed in this world.
truth to be told, i've fallen. i'm lost as to what to do. but i know one thing i can do, and that is to return to my Father in heaven. but that's like the hardest part! it is the most painful and the most draining part as it sucks out every ounce of emotion from you.
other train of thoughts or struggles: why do i have to show people who i am or prove to them that i am capable of something? why do i feel the need to? why do people think that they know more than you? in ministry and church sense, do you offer to serve or do you wait for them to ask? or maybe should i put it this way, do we wait for God to provide a way in due time? what does being humble mean? why do i sometimes feel that ppl do not care as much as they seem to care? AND REALLY.. why do i feel the way i feel?
it's during these times that i miss home so so much! i miss car, i miss the bedok l cell, i miss THE Lcell, i miss my mummy. because i know all you guys out there love me for who i am, even in my most rotten form i believe you'd all still be there for me. i know i do not have to try to please you all, i know that i will not be judged, i know that i can find the support and love i need from y'all.
i'm just tired from all these. i feel so weak at times, i just need YOU (points up)
Disclaimer:
with such an entry, i must clarify to say that there were happy things that happened too. eg serving in children's ministry aka taking care of 18mth-3yr old kiddos, sand fight at the beach, paintball, chilling in king's park, wii, boardgames, rugby, playing and taking care of many many kids after church together with liangsheng ystd as the adults talked and surprising liangsheng by washing his car today becasue he's been such a great friend =) etc.
i have gone from rock bottom..
to sky high..
to rock bottom..
to sky high.
one thing in my mind now is: how do i stand firm and stay in line with God's will? today i read "if you stand for nothing, you fall for anything" and i think that is soooooooo true! it's getting so real for me these days. that i really need to know what i believe, what my convictions are and what are my values or i'll be totally swayed in this world.
truth to be told, i've fallen. i'm lost as to what to do. but i know one thing i can do, and that is to return to my Father in heaven. but that's like the hardest part! it is the most painful and the most draining part as it sucks out every ounce of emotion from you.
other train of thoughts or struggles: why do i have to show people who i am or prove to them that i am capable of something? why do i feel the need to? why do people think that they know more than you? in ministry and church sense, do you offer to serve or do you wait for them to ask? or maybe should i put it this way, do we wait for God to provide a way in due time? what does being humble mean? why do i sometimes feel that ppl do not care as much as they seem to care? AND REALLY.. why do i feel the way i feel?
it's during these times that i miss home so so much! i miss car, i miss the bedok l cell, i miss THE Lcell, i miss my mummy. because i know all you guys out there love me for who i am, even in my most rotten form i believe you'd all still be there for me. i know i do not have to try to please you all, i know that i will not be judged, i know that i can find the support and love i need from y'all.
i'm just tired from all these. i feel so weak at times, i just need YOU (points up)
Disclaimer:
with such an entry, i must clarify to say that there were happy things that happened too. eg serving in children's ministry aka taking care of 18mth-3yr old kiddos, sand fight at the beach, paintball, chilling in king's park, wii, boardgames, rugby, playing and taking care of many many kids after church together with liangsheng ystd as the adults talked and surprising liangsheng by washing his car today becasue he's been such a great friend =) etc.
posted by hui at
10:02 PM
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